I work from home, most days. When I am not at events, I am in my office. When people find out what I do, they always say "You are so Lucky!", or "how nice to be able to work whenever you want!?", and "how nice that you can be with your kids all day long!".
The truth? It is freaking hard work, and it never ends. I don't work 40 hours a week. My hours don't end nor are they numbered. I am constantly torn between finishing the dishes or scheduling clients & making a deadline. I don't get a lunch break. As I am writing this, I am nursing my 7 month old baby. I am in yoga pants and I look like shit. I am exhausted from my 3 kids, taking them to school and all that goes with that, water day for my 2nd grader, appointments in between and being stressed all day because I should have sent an email out to a team member a week ago.
Is my schedule flexible? To some degree, yes. But one thing that most people don't understand is, I am NOT a STAY at home mom. I am a WORK from home mom. There is a big difference. No, I cannot chat on the phone all day, because I am working. I cannot go on play dates, because I am working. It is a funky blend between feeling so depressed because my 7 month old doesn't talk back to me and I am lonely and "Why do people call me all day?? I cant talk! Don't they know I am working?" Its a problem, and I still haven't found the solution to it.
And this whole, it takes a tribe to raise kids? Well my tribe is all over the world. Our parents and siblings are all spread out and aunts and uncles are a flight away. So the tribe in Phoenix, is at a serious minimum. Meaning date nights are basically non existent, I am trying to shoot for my blog with kids running around and I grocery shop with all three kids.
Why am I sharing this? Because, I am in a rough season of life right now with big transitions, stressful situations and sleepless nights. Am I blessed? Absolutely. Am I thankful? You bet. I LOVE my littles and I LOVE the chaos. Is this a complaint? Not really... I just have three children, we are living in a condo, under contract on a house, transitioning my business, shooting some major things for the website, my husbands new position at work, and some massive family changes as well. We are in a busy season. We are in a season of change. And change can be uncomfortable. Right now, I am feeling that discomfort. I am itching with discontent and comparison is really the thief of joy. Which is what brought me to this post. When we mindlessly flip through Instagram, know that these are small blurbs of peoples lives. I might post a cute picture of my kids, but 5 minutes before that - they were screaming (or maybe it was me doing the yelling).
Some people might be envious that I "work from home", but its hard stuff, friends. And to be honest, I crave the consistency of a full time job (as well as the consistent paycheck). I am so thankful for my job (all of them), and love it. I honestly, do. But I want to clarify the juggling act that I partake in daily. Being a mom is a busy job anyway, but tack on "running your own business" (or businesses), and just call me cray cray.
How do I juggle it all? What is my saving grace? My schedule. My OCD, color coded, plan sheets and a grace filled schedule. And Jesus. But we will save that for another post....or series.
Till next time friends.... Cheers to motherhood/entrepreneur-hood.